Bleu Blanc Rouge

I feel like the gargoyle pictured right. So close to Paris, yet not quite able to get there just yet... (P.S. When I google image searched "Paris", I was so tempted to post a picture of Paris Hilton. Really. Because apparently I am four years old.)

I fought with myself over the course of several hours tonight on whether or not I had anything significant enough to blog about. Scratch that, as I know I have much to say, but being a naïve and self-conscious Blogger, I'm never sure what people want to hear from me while I'm away. That, and I've been leaving my camera at home recently (I'm trying to fit in more, guys), so I have no cute pictures to post. What is the point of a blog post without pictures? No one wants to read so much exposition! In any case, I promise to no longer worry about what I'm writing or not writing. I'll use this as the other half of my personal journal, which I'm positive no one would want to read...

In the same vein, I've become hyper-aware of myself while being in France. I guess I've always looked in the mirror a lot, but here, I do it constantly. Not, as one might think, for some reason of vanity, but because I am starting to see something different when I look in the mirror. It's cheesy, yes! And by no means do I mean to say that I have come to know myself in these past two weeks. If anything, my time in France has complicated things, but in the most exciting way. We've been spending a lot of time in a relatively small town, doing many things that I have never done before. I am learning quickly what I do like, and what I don't like. I am learning that I can empower myself to take control of my own education (and I use that term broadly) while I'm here, and I'm learning that I can eat more baguettes than imaginable. I guess this isn't about anything specific. I have just come to recognize that I tend to categorize myself as a "follower" when put into new situations, and it's time for me to re-think that assessment. Because that isn't who I see when I look in the mirror anymore. I was so nervous before coming to France, thinking that I would flounder and cling to anyone who would give me advice - but I am not that girl! I feel independent, ready to take off and see what I need to see, and not what others think I want to see.

That take off, now that I mention it, is SO SOON! My flight to Paris leaves at 11 AM Sunday morning, and I couldn't possibly be more excited about it. I've loved my time in Bordeaux, but I

think everyone on my program is about ready to dive in to the deep end of the pool. I got my host family arrangements yesterday, and I am living in the 12ième (12th) Arrondissement, the largest Arrondissement in Paris, on the Right Bank of the Seine and close to the Opéra Bastille. My host family consists of a one-year-old girl and a 21-month-old boy and their two fathers. I don't think I could have it any better. Really, I am thrilled. My neighborhood is actually quite far from my University, but I am happy to be living in an entirely different area from school. I hope to be exploring as much as possible, taking the metro to many Arrondissements and renting bikes to ride in the park. All of this is, of course, my idealic version of Paris, but trust me - you will all be the first to know exactly how everything pans out. It is such a good feeling, to be in a foreign country, completely content, feeling satisfied by my education here, and to truly feel like anything is possible. I've got plans to go to Lyon! Munich! Amsterdam! Florence! London! Barcelona! What a wonderful thing to see pipe dreams come true. Although, my classes at Paris III (part of the University of Paris system, also known as La Sorbonne Nouvelle) are not even posted yet, so I have no idea what I'll be taking. I know that as a Theatre major, it is expected that I take classes in that department - but I have no interest in taking acting courses while here. Acting in French would be... how do you say it... un désastre. To say the least. Mais, ça va!

Also, I had the privilige of going to French cooking school the other day. Anyone who knows me knows that I am better off staying away from anything resembling a kitchen, as I am entirely uncoordinated and any food that requires effort on my part is not something I'm generally interested in. It was great, however, to walk into "L'Atelier des Chefs" and feel like I had the skill set necessary to complete the task at hand. Granted, it was a simple recipe of Salmon over carmelized carrots, but I felt mildly proud of myself for following directions (in French!) and being able to implement them properly. The meal was incroyable even though I normally hate cooked carrots, and it was paired with a Sauvignon Blanc that was to die for. What if I came back from France as a food connaisseur? Me, the cooking-challenged American girl who hates spices and/or flavor. For now, I'm hoping to be able to survive cooking for myself in Paris. Eee gad.